Monthly Archives: February 2016

Three Beautiful Things

My dear friend River gave me a task: I was recently performing in Boston, staying across from Boston Common, and she asked me to find three beautiful things and describe them to her.

As you wish:

  1. Green. The grass, the rolling small hills. Decorated here and there with snow and ice, making the scene quite surreal. Green is my favorite color, the color of my magic. It is the color of life and nature. The scene was so green it even reflected on the pond. The common was crowded and bustling, yet the green shone through all of it, adding joy to the people there.
  2. Water. There’s a pond, and people on swan boats. The water reflects the green and the blue in the sky. I couldn’t see how wide it was from  my vantage point. I also couldn’t tell how deep. It was all sparkling diamonds and tiny waves. It was true love, and light hearts.
  3. Light. It was fading as I finished my small journey. I watched the sky change colors and fade toward purple/ black. I watched the streetlights come slowly to life. I watched people holding hands and laughing as they made their way home. The light made music, if you understand. The hum and heartbeat of the common changing, slowing as the light led the emotion.

I could name a hundred more individual, beautiful things … because a friend invited me to open my eyes and see them.

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I Sincerely Hope

“What is done with love is done well.” ~ Vincent Van Gogh

If you are reading this: I love you. I have compassion and affection for you. I want you to succeed in your endeavors and I want you to feel loved. Because you are. You are loved. More: You deserve love. You are an amazing, gifted creature. You are unique in the entire multiverse. Accept it, and pass it around.

I live my life with my heart out. If you look closely at my sleeve you’ll discover that I’m not hiding cards; I’m displaying my feels. I’m not ashamed and I’m not likely to change soon.

This wearing has cost me. Cost me friends, cost me work … and it cost me my marriage. Oh – it wasn’t the only straw, but it was certainly one of them.

I put my heart on display when I work. I strive to do so in my ‘off the stage’ life. Being human, I often stumble in this quest, but I keep loving anyway. Love is my god. It exists because I feed it and I worship it and I give it praise. I allow it to rule me. Well … I do my best to allow it to rule me. That’s not always easy, and some folks make it damn hard, but let me tell you:

I love You. I love exactly You. Your blemishes, Your so called ‘imperfections’, Your mistakes … I love You when I vehemently disagree with Your actions and points of view. I love Your scars, because they tell me of Your story, Your pain … and I will love You and listen to Your story and try to help You bear some of the burden, if i can.

Love is not small: Love is as broad and deep as the sky. We can all share in it and not one person need be left out. Not. One.

First Valentine’s Day alone in 28 years. I’m feeling it, friends. I feel it like physical loss. I’m going to keep on loving, anyway. Her. Them. You. Because that’s what I know to do.

On this day, on every day: I sincerely hope there’s love where you are.


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When I Come Home

The house s full, tonight. There’s restlessness and anticipation. I am welcomed with love and smiles, even from those here who don’t know me very well. We interact, we converse, we dance.

This is my home. I’ve been building it all my life, it seems. The lights are always warm and bright and my audience is sad (a bit) when our time is done. I live here, on this stage. There is love in abundance, where I am.


When I Come Home

The house is empty. It is almost always empty. There is stillness, peace and quiet. There are books to welcome me, and … myself to converse with.

This is my home. I built it over the course of scant months, it seems. Once I lived in a house teeming with energy, love and compassion, but … I ruined that. I destroyed it without even trying. So now I pass the time working toward getting back on stage as soon as possible. I try not to think of what I burned behind me.

There is love in abundance, but I lost it.


Filed under Musings, Public Diary