One of the questions I am asked most often is “why aren’t you on TV?” or “why aren’t you working in Las Vegas or somewhere big?”
When I was a boy it was a big treat to be allowed to stay up late and watch the variety shows that were popular at the time. My parents were big fans of Glen Campbell and Johnny Cash. Occasionally I would see Donnie & Marie and Sonny & Cher. When I saw the singers and musicians and artists having all the fun … I knew that was all I ever wanted to do. (I do remember it being a kind of a letdown when I found out they took money for their performances … who needs to be paid when people are clapping for you?)
I remember seeing the Monkees being chased down the street by adoring fans, in much the same way the Beatles did in their time. How exciting … until it happens to you. Now I haven’t been chased by throngs, but I have been stalked by people who thought they really wanted to be a part of my world.
You lose some of yourself when you wear your heart on your sleeve and present your craft for the public. Sometimes you don’t get it back, sometimes it changes you a little. Some people turn to alcohol or drugs to cope with these changes … some turn to other things equally as damaging.
I can’t stop doing what I do – and I don’t want to. I believe I am following the path God has put me on faithfully, and using this gift the way He intended. There are times that really strain my soul, though.
Did any of this make any sense at all?
“How many people can you love, when you’re black & blue with bruises from collisions on the road. The friction grind of traveling on a never-ending show. What kind of a man can live this way as long as I have and stay the same?
Right now all I want to do is get real, if that’s alright with you.”